It is often difficult to see the light in times of suffering. Pain and adversity can overwhelm us, making it hard to recognize anything positive. However, gratitude is a practice that transforms our perspective, letting go of what we don’t have and focusing on the abundance we have. In The Unbreakable Human Spirit of Resilience, I share how cultivating gratitude helped me overcome my worst experiences, from the horrors of war to profound loss.
The Transformative Power of Gratitude
Gratitude is not about ignoring pain or pretending everything is perfect. Instead, it is about reframing our experiences and focusing on what we still have, even when life feels unbearable. According to research by Emmons and McCullough (2003), practicing gratitude profoundly impacts mental health, increasing resilience and well-being in adversity. When we intentionally focus on the positive aspects of our lives, no matter how small, we create a mental buffer that helps us better cope with difficult situations.
During the Liberian civil war, gratitude was my salvation. Amid chaos and doubt, I learned to treasure small moments of safety, the generosity of strangers, and the lessons that adversity imparted upon me. This attitude didn’t wash away the hurt but made me feel powerful. Gratitude was my weapon—a weapon I used to convert hurt into power.
Gratitude and Resilience: The Connection
Research consistently shows that practicing gratitude enhances resilience. A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that individuals who regularly practiced gratitude were more emotionally resilient and capable of recovering from stressful life events (Emmons & McCullough, 2003). Gratitude takes us away from what is wrong and towards what is good and empowers us to take charge of our situations.
Gratitude also improves psychological health by giving people a sense of purpose and significance, even in the face of suffering. One of the most influential gratitude researchers is the psychologist Robert Emmons: Practicing gratitude encourages people to pay attention to what is good in their lives and, in turn, cultivates optimism, energy, and life satisfaction (Emmons, 2013).
This perspective was crucial for me during my most challenging times. Instead of being consumed by war's overwhelming losses and fears, I practiced gratitude daily. I was thankful for peace, my family's strength, and the optimism that got me through. Gratitude was simply a way of taking back control over things that didn’t even affect me.
How Gratitude Reframes Challenges
Gratitude does not mean that we ignore the suffering or challenges we face. It’s the understanding that no matter what is going on, you’re never too good at anything. This perspective shift doesn’t detract from our difficulties' severity but allows us to think of them differently. By focusing on what we do have rather than what we lack, we can create a sense of abundance even in the darkest moments.
Gratitude reframes challenges by helping us to recognize the value in our struggles. In The Unbreakable Human Spirit of Resilience, I recount how, in my darkest years, I embraced adversity as a lesson. I began to understand how robust the process of overcoming hardship was and what hardship taught me. By thinking about what I could have learned from my journey rather than what I had lost, I could find meaning in my suffering.
Practical Strategies to Cultivate Gratitude
While gratitude is a powerful tool for transforming pain into power, it requires consistent practice. Here are some evidence-based strategies to help you cultivate gratitude and build resilience:
Daily Gratitude Journal: A simple yet effective strategy is to keep a gratitude journal daily. Write down three things you’re grateful for every day, however small. It can be as simple as feeling thankful for a good friend, a beautiful day, or the courage to keep going. Journaling has been shown to boost emotional well-being and foster optimism daily (Emmons & McCullough, 2003).
Gratitude Reflection During Tough Times: When you find yourself in a difficult moment, stop and consider what you’re grateful for. It might be a shoulder to cry on, a lesson learned, or the courage to overcome the challenge. It shifts your emphasis to appreciation – even when circumstances seem otherwise – and offers a more balanced view.
Express Gratitude to Others: Gratitude is also about relationships. Make it a point to thank those who have helped you. Whether it’s a letter, a conversation, or an acknowledgment, thanking others makes relationships more durable and emotionally healthy.
Mindful Appreciation: Try to incorporate gratitude into your mindfulness practice by spending a few minutes each day thinking about what you value. Mindfulness keeps you grounded in the now, and gratitude lets you focus on what’s good in your life – a great blend of the mind and soul.
The Role of Gratitude in Healing
Gratitude not only transforms our mindset but also helps to heal our emotions. In gratitude, we can process difficult emotions such as anger, sadness, and fear more quickly because we are simultaneously grateful for the good and the bad. This moderation enables us to move forward through loss and suffering without despairing.
Gratitude helped me heal from the traumas of war by reminding me that there was still beauty, kindness, and love in the world, even at the worst of times. It gave me the strength to move forward and rebuild my life, one step at a time.
Key Takeaway for Your Journey
Gratitude is a powerful tool for resilience. It enables us to use suffering to our advantage by focusing on what’s good about our experiences, even during dark times. By practicing gratitude, we can reframe our challenges and find the strength to persevere.
Actionable Step
Start being grateful today by keeping a gratitude journal daily. List three things that you are thankful for, no matter how small. It’s a simple practice that will transform your awareness from lack to abundance and resilience.
If you want to read more about gratitude and turning hardship into strength, check out The Unbreakable Human Spirit of Resilience, where I share the practices that helped me navigate adversity and restore my strength.
References
Emmons, R. A., & McCullough, M. E. (2003). Counting blessings versus burdens: An experimental investigation of gratitude and subjective well-being in daily life. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(2), 377-389.
Emmons, R. A. (2013). Gratitude Works!: A 21-Day Program for Creating Emotional Prosperity. Jossey-Bass.